Question: Doctrinal Comfort for mothers of stillborn children or who have had miscarriages

My friend Juliet asked that I look up within the Scriptures and words of modern prophets words of comfort for those mothers who have lost children.  These are my findings:

 My first thought came from 1 Nephi 19:23...."for I did liken all scripture unto us that it might be for our profit and learning." 

While I didn't remember any stories in scripture about miscarriages or stillborn children, I do know there are plenty of occasions of grief--that is a universal experience. So, I wanted to learn what we can gain from scriptural accounts of grief and suffering, and how that could bring doctrinal comfort and insight into the grief and suffering that comes from losing a precious little one. 

Here are the scriptures I found from that search and I invite you to look them up as well.

1 Peter 2:19-23 which talks about the reward for suffering in righteousness, Proverbs 15:13 says, "A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance; but by sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken." Don't think of broken as in un-fixable, but broken the way a horse is broken--teachable, willing to submit to the Master, faithful.

Psalms 116:15 "Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of His saints." 

MY THOUGHTS--I believe God views death differently than we do. If it comes about "on its own" not through murder, etc., then death is not a tragedy to Him--death is perhaps joyful to Him because it means His children are finished here and can return home to Him. I don't think it's all that big of a deal to Him, because He sees through an eternal lens and death is only another step into eternity. From there, I looked up your question on LDS.org to find out if there is any specific information regarding miscarriages or stillborn children. I found a great article, which I will also post that answers some of the aching questions. It also differentiates between children who are stillborn, and miscarriages. It suggests that stillborn babies--babies that would have been viable outside of the womb given their gestational age--may be recorded on family history records, etc. Joseph Fielding Smith said, "We should have a hope that these little ones will receive a resurrection and then belong to us." It is MY interpretation based on my readings of that article, "I have a question", is that in most (if not all) cases of stillbirth, the child will be restored to you in the resurrection, and in Heaven will be as much a part of your family as any other child. Miscarriage is a little less certain, but I don't see anything that necessarily closes the door on it. So, I kept looking. I read John 6:39, and I hope you will too. It discusses an important principle that I remembered Elder Wirthlin mentioning in his wonderful talk, "Come What May and Love it."  He discusses the principle of compensation. He said,

"The Lord compensates the faithful for every loss. That which is taken away from those who love the Lord will be added unto them in His own way. While it may not come at the time we desire, the faithful will know that every tear today will eventually be returned a hundredfold with tears of rejoicing and gratitude.

"One of the blessings of the gospel is the knowledge that when the curtain of death signals the end of our mortal lives, life will continue on the other side of the veil. There we will be given new opportunities. Not even death can take from us the eternal blessings promised by a loving Heavenly Father."

MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS--Reading this information all together leads me to one conclusion. I believe the hope that follows a miscarriage or stillbirth comes in this: Either that child will be restored to us in Heaven as one of our own children and the glory of being his or her mother remains and our tears of sorrow will be replaced with tears of joy at reuniting, OR, we will be compensated a hundredfold in the Lord's own way with tears of rejoicing and gratitude for our loss. The Lord will not let us down and He will not leave us to our suffering. I hope you will read the scriptures and talks/articles and I pray they will bring you comfort and strength. Thank you for sharing your question.

The Search for Truth

I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Much of the foundation of my testimony of this Church's truthfulness, is that I know that if I have a doctrinal question or doubt, there IS an answer. Many of the questions I have had have been answered through the Scriptures--the Holy Bible, the Book of Mormon, the Doctrine and Covenants and the Pearl of Great Price. Other questions have been answered through answers to prayer or to the words of the prophets and apostles since the Restoration of Christ's Church. BUT, there are always answers. It was life-changing for me when once in high school, I had a doctrinal question; I searched the Scriptures and studied and I thoughtfully prayed. After much prayer, the answer that came to me was something like this: "Rebecca, there IS an answer. You don't need to know it now. But trust in ME that there is an answer." I think from then on, I have known that Christ's TRUE Church has the answer to our questions. Many of them can be given to us if we seek diligently and study in faith. Some will be withheld because we don't really need to know them right now. BUT, there are ALWAYS answers. I am starting this blog because I have felt inspired by the answers I have found in the Scriptures and the words of the prophets. My intent is not to be controversial, but to seek God's answers and His perfect truth. I believe wholeheartedly that there is one truth. We can choose to get with the program or not, but only through HIM do we find truth--not because it seems good or it's a popular notion, but because it came from God. I am not in any way an official spokesperson for the Church and I will try my hardest to always share my own thoughts and feelings as such and not claim them to be official doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and certainly not God's. We're all in this journey together--trying to come closer to our Lord. SO, with that, I invite you to join with me in the search for answers. When I receive a doctrinal question, or doubt about my own Church, religion in general, etc., I will post it here with my findings/thoughts/feelings. This is a safe place--at least from me. I will not judge your questions, but invite all who wish to know more to search with me, for Christ Himself promised that if we seek, so also we shall find.